You want to be a man, but you aren't willing to do what it takes to become one.

Mad at the World

Doesn't it seem a little childish to get mad when the world doesn't turn out the way you think it should? I don't know..

50% rule

Half of your life will be better than average, the other half will be worse than average.

Oblivion

If you can accept that you will lose everything there is nothing left to fear.

Can't get no satisfaction

So I was had a two-hour break between classes today. Normally I would get food, but I had no money so I didn't. I was considering what I wanted to do, and found that I had no immediate desires; no direction I needed or wanted to go in.

"Wow," I thought to myself. "This is like a little slice of enlightenment."

After a while though, I started getting bored. I was at peace, but without the tension of everyday life I felt less alive.

"Jesus," I thought. "I've been struggling for this? My life would be so boring."

For a little while I was facing a crisis; if peace was not the ultimate goal, what was? What would lead me to satisfaction?

And so came this question, which I feel is very important:

Are you satisfied with your life right now?

I am not. I would not be happy living the rest of my days in the same manner as I am right now. I want to wake up every day excited to be alive, with a purpose in my mind. This starts now. I will work until I reach the day where every day is incredible. And then I will be satisfied.

ARGH

So I finally meet a girl I really like and I think she likes me, and then I ask her out and it turns out she's a lesbian.

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Competition and Dreams

He says "Bill, I believe this is killing me,"
as a smile ran away from his face;
"Well I'm sure that I could be a movie star
if I could get out of this place."
Billy Joel, The Piano Man

I was going to post this yesterday but I fell asleep at 6 and didn't wake up until today.

When I think about my dreams of being famous, I am often overcome with a real sense of urgency and dread; for every second I spend not cultivating my talent, there is somebody who is. I am falling behind in the race, one step at a time, and by the time I reach the finish line nobody will care.

Recently I considered the idea that I don't need to race if I don't want the prize. Certainly, there are people who want it more, and they are far more likely to get it. So perhaps the correct path is to give up on my dream and pursue something more doable.

Later that day I talked to Wendy, one of my teachers. Her belief was that you should follow your dreams, regardless of how impossible they may seem, because they are your dreams and the mere pursuit of them is rewarding in itself. The pain of failure may be great, but not as bad as the regret of an unpursued dream. And as long as you are pursuing your dream, in a sense you are living it.

So forget about the competition, and follow your dream no matter how slow the progress is. Keep it alive, and keep moving towards it, even if its only an inch at a time.